Tag Archives: Dreams

#363 ~ Life Lesson No. 43

As fragile as your dreams may be, as fearful as you are that they will never be seen, you have them, they are precious, now make them breathe.

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#356 ~ Nocturnal Harvest

I had convinced myself that sunlight was a stimulant, so i slept with curtains open, allowing dawn to break against my face – but my eyelids never fluttered.

I had argued to myself that my aural cognition was highly acute, so the speakers remained orange, the playlist on loop, but my eyes failed to flutter.

I had promised that conversation stirred my cells, so I left the battery in and asked for you to call, yet my tongue lay heavy on the roof of my oral floor, and my eyelids barely fluttered.

So I consigned myself to sleep, knowing that if I only sow what I reap, I would forever have a harvest of dreams.

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#240 ~ Ithemba Projects: Day 7

I’ve come to the end of my first week…and the smell of that red soil has done it again. It’s like the scent of home cooking which brings with it a deep, yet gentle reassurance of safety, family, of a future. Yet, simultaneously it speaks of discomfort, of a need to read against the grain, to go against the essence of oneself.

In this week I’ve gone from having an adverse reaction to genuinely falling in love with my crèche babies. Perhaps it’s the latent mothering instinct within me which is deciding to rear its premature head, yet the desire to protect and nurture has thankfully overwhelmed the fear that resided there to begin with.

I have also had my first experience of teaching – teaching children who are hungry to be taught. It has made me, on reflection, so grateful for the incredible (free) education I have benefitted from, yet also hopeful. Teaching children my own age has yes, on one hand, shown me how blessed I am, and how much I have to offer, yet it has also reignited in me that desire to learn, and to be unashamed to do so. The children at Msimude came with a bravado, with chatter and perhaps pride, yet within their letters, the veneer of control is gently stripped away. I have been reminded not only of the power of the written word, but the power of dreams. If these children can hold visions of becoming engineers, social workers, nurses and DJ’s, then I also can hold onto my dreams. Just as their letters have inspired me, perhaps my writings will inspire others. I don’t envision myself as a teacher, but I have always dreamed of going back to Nigeria and doing a year of Youth Core Service, and now I think I know what I will do. When I started Uni, I came with a pride, with an arrogance, and with my own bravado. Seeing them learn, seeing them hungry for the little I have to offer, has humbled me and humbled the way I view my own teachers.

In this coming week I will return to Edendale hospital. Originally a ‘blacks only hospital’ under the Apartheid regime, Edendale is still racially segregated with few whites even driving down the road which leads into its township. When I visited Edendale three years ago I was disturbed to hear that many of the children in the hospital had, quite literally, been abandoned. Either because parents couldn’t walk the long distance to visit their children, or because they knew at least there they would receive decent food, shelter and medical attention. I don’t know what to expect tomorrow, but I do hope that the work that two British Expats have done for years has continued to grow. To see more about Edendale Outreach please click here.

I will also start my first teaching lessons at Mountain Home Primary School, as well as continuing to help out at the Saturday Kids Clubs (Jabulani and Kulah), alongside the weekly life groups, Msimude High School, the Drop in Centre Creche and the Running (potentially walking) Club. Bring it.

Prayer for Day 7 – For a continued strength in the weeks to come. That the children would be inspired in the lessons. For safety for the Ithemba team and that a spirit of Joy and Hope would be upon us. That my eyes would be opened to new stories and I would continue (or begin) to be a light in Sweetwaters.

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#113 ~ Free your Mind

Free your mind from all the doubts

The fears of inadequacy that creep up stealthily –

Free your mind from all the voices

That tell you to worry –

Free your mind from the fantasies and dreams

That take you away from an engrossing reality

Free your mind

And let it Be in the present

Get peace, Get Free, Get Alive

With a freedom inspired mind.

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#107 ~ One Hundred Words and A Photo : 7

From her window, if she left one ear on the sagging pillow, slightly raising her left shoulder, she could just about peep over the ledge before the squeal of the burnt tyres fled like a stamped out fire. Refracted and misdirected in the sweat lined window pane, the light appeared dis-coloured and vague in shape. She sighed, letting her head sink back again. It reminded her of the obscure vision that played in her brain, danced through the rain of pervasive thoughts that told her perhaps but in short, she would have to work, wait, before her great escape.

Photo:

Victoria O, Copyrighted

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#71 ~ Dreaming in New Frontiers

What causes tomorrow to come today? What galvanises and inspires a race that has achieved and conquered nature, bent the world to its will, to continue pressing forward? What gives us the audacity to even dare to dream in something more?

An experience. An encounter. A revelation of something greater than ourselves.

This was a question posed to me by a young engineer. That ‘more’ for him, was the opportunity to step outside our atmosphere and dare to proclaim our presence in Space. In the unknown territory that poets and astrologers have dreamed about, written about, and scientists and engineers have studied for, invested in. The chance to claim a new frontier, to envision the currently limitless potential of the unforeseen, the distant dream.

When we first entered space, that moment, reduced a barrier of fear and injected a dose of sight, foresight. It created, according to these new space pioneers, the ‘space’ to dream about tomorrow, to believe in a tomorrow, when today seems so bleak. When oil crises’, war, poverty, famine, and disillusionment smear the stars of our sky, pushing into the unknown simply opens up a new galaxy, a new constellation, a new sky to gaze upon.

To conjure what could be, through daring to act out what might be. Dreaming in new frontiers in order to redefine the old, in the process recreating mankind and his universal role.

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#5 ~ I Woz ‘Ere: 2k4 – 2k11

This evening marked my official ‘so long’ from Secondary School Education. As I sat in the Hall with a perfume headache and the innate itching sensation that can only be found in overheated auditoriums, it was with a sweet smile my eyes took themselves on a journey back to Year Seven. I could recount a range of incidences and experiences, but what struck most was the memory of my sister and I saying to ourselves after an assembly –

One day, my name is going to be emblazoned in gold-paint on those ‘School Achievers’ Boards.’

The moment I donned that blazer and wore that emblem, I’d felt a deep need to be remembered. I wanted to leave my mark on that institution, for people to think of me when it was mentioned. I didn’t want notoriety. I wanted excellence. I wanted to give my all and shape and re-mould that school until it became a part of me and I became an intrinsic part of it.

These may seem like lofty aspirations, but I have always been raised to believe that life is there to be marked. Redesigned, redefined and shaped in whatever capacity by those who pass through it. After seven years in that institution giving my everything, soaking in every scent, masticating every morsel, leeching all the nutrients and opportunities, before exhaling my own impression, my own impact, I was returned once more to  a newly decorated, but ever the same, School Hall. And at the end of the evening I got to smile. Because Lo and Behold, unexpected, not unwanted, but unforeseen, I left that school with my name on not one but two of the school boards. One is in the Chapel. The other is in that Main Hall.

If my 11-year-old self could know something now that she didn’t, it’s that her dreams and aspirations have come to fruition. Hopefully they will continue to. Hopefully the person she has become will never be afraid to dream…and actively make those dreams a reality.

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